Do you remember what they sounded like? What your last conversation with them was? What their laugh sounded like?
In the past two years I have lost three grandparents all in different circumstances. Lately they’ve been crossing my mind and I’ve been missing them more. My mind plays scenarios from when they were alive.
The one thing I miss the most is their voices. I’ll always remember what they smelled like, what they wore, and how they looked in good health. But without recordings how do you remember what they sounded like and be sure that’s how they sounded?
The mind can play cruel tricks on you and your loved ones voices can easily be lost within your own thoughts processing their memories over and over again.
Like money, the more you use it the more diluted it becomes. The more you think of them speaking over the years after they passed, their voices in your head may not sound like how they actually spoke.
This scares me to think that one day I will not remember their voices or the last thing we said to each other. So I ask you again…
Do you remember what your loved one sounded like?
Do you remember what your last conversation with them was?
Do you remember what their laugh sounded like?
Grief, I learned, is really just love. It’s all the love you want to give, but cannot. All of that unspent love gathers in the corners of your eyes, the lump in your throat, and in the hollow part of your chest. Grief is just love with no place to go.(Jamie Anderson, Good Reads Inc)
As I stare at my child each day I look at her full of all the love and support that I could possibly give another person. Sometimes I take a moment and just think that wow…I have lost many loved ones that were so influential and prominent in my everyday life.
I noticed that before each of my loved ones deaths, as an adult, I knew that they were about to pass away. However in the last four months I have lost my grandmother in August and my grandfather in November. Not only did I realize that they were about to pass away but the next thought that came to mind after realizing that they were going to die was “My daughter won’t know them…they won’t be there to watch her grow”
Now that I have started my own grieving process I once again looked at my child and realized that one day she too will be in the same spot as me. One day she won’t have me and her daddy here in the physical world with her, and that hurts to know that.
I have also learned that our bodies do not have souls, but our souls have bodies. All that love from my deceased loved ones not only passed down to me but also to my child . Although their souls have left their human capsule their love, by the grace of God, endureth forever.
Right now it is hard to love my deceased ones because they are not physically here, and it’s painful…physically painful. But that doesn’t stop my want and need to show them my love and receive theirs in person.
I’m just saying what’s been on my mind lately. If you’ve gone through some kind of grief in your life and want to share or support others your more then welcome to sound off in the comments.
If you or anyone you know is dealing with a death of a loved family member, allow them to have their own time. People cope with things differently. Allow them the time to learn to deal with such a tuff time.
I just lost my grandmother due to complications during a procedure. She had over twenty tumors and 3 different types of cancer. During her recent procedure, she started bleeding internally and doctors couldn’t really contain it. She lost 75% of her blood and her liver and kidneys failed. She fought a long hard battle with cancer for the last 7 years. When she first was diagnosed she was given 6 months… 6 MONTHS…. 6 months turned into 7 years. Everyday with her has been a huge blessing.
She created a bucket list when she found out about her cancer and she knocked off a lot from that list. She received a great grandchild, got a house, seen my mom and dad get married after 25 years of being together…. She lived a rich life with the time she was given. We’ve had her for 7 more Christmas’s then we thought we would’ve had.
It’s been very hard for the rest of the family and I but we’re getting through it. I just hope she comes down to see me in my dreams every now and again.
Thank you for reading!
What are some ways you have dealt with a death in the family? How long did it take for it to settle in? How close were you with your passed loved one?
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